👻 ADN Fear Files: OCD and My Bedroom TV

Go ahead and laugh if you want — I used to be genuinely scared of my bedroom TV.

Not because of what was on it.

But because of what it might do.

For a long time, my brain was convinced the TV could turn itself on while I was asleep. No reason. No logic. Just the certainty that if it happened, something bad would follow. That the noise would jolt me awake, that it would mean danger, that I wouldn’t cope.

So I did what my OCD told me to do.

I checked it.

I unplugged it.

I stared at the red standby light like it was a threat.

I tried to sleep while listening for a sound that never came.

Nothing ever happened.

Not once.

But the fear felt real — because OCD doesn’t deal in probabilities, it deals in what ifs. And when you’re a kid or a teenager, alone in your bedroom at night, those what ifs feel enormous.

This wasn’t silliness.

It wasn’t drama.

It was a brain trying desperately to keep me safe — just going about it in the loudest, most exhausting way possible.

Looking back now, I don’t cringe.

I feel compassion.

For the girl who just wanted quiet.

For the girl who wanted to sleep without her thoughts keeping watch.

For the girl who didn’t have the words yet, but was doing her best.

So yes — this one goes in the Fear Files.

Not as a joke.

But as proof that fear doesn’t have to be logical to be real.

And if you had a fear like this too?

You weren’t weird.

You were coping.

🖤