Nostalgia Pack: S Club 7 Dolls (aka the strangest merch collab of the early 00s)

Because nothing says childhood like a slightly uncanny Bradley staring at you from a toy shelf.

Fun Facts

• Released in 2000 by Vivid Imaginations (aka the same people who did Spice Girls dolls).
• Each member had their own doll, complete with an outfit inspired by “S Club Party”.
• The dolls even came with tiny CDs — not playable, just props. Peak marketing gimmick.

Classic Chaos

• Stiff arms and legs that made actual “dancing” impossible — ironic for a band known for choreography.
• Faces that were… let’s just say loosely inspired by reality. Poor Hannah looked like she’d seen some things.
• The fact that kids would mix them in with Barbies and suddenly you’d have Jo O’Meara dating Ken.

Where You Might Remember Them From

• Argos catalogues, circled in biro at Christmas time.
• Woolworths toy aisles, staring blankly from behind plastic windows.
• Birthday parties, where someone inevitably showed off their Rachel doll like it was a prized possession.

Daisy’s Corner

Oh babes, the S Club dolls were basically fever-dream Barbies with worse hair. Like — why does Tina look like she’s on day three of no sleep? And don’t get me started on Paul, who resembled a geography teacher in plastic form. Still, icon behaviour. Every millennial girl squad deserved a wonky plastic backup band.

Your Turn

Did you have an S Club doll? Did they join your Barbies, or did they sit in a drawer giving you side-eye? Share your cursed toy memories below!