Not everyone’s first crush was a conventional one.
Some people swooned over Zac Efron, or the cool kid in Year 6, or maybe even Peter Andre (no judgment).
Me?
My first crush was Basil Brush.
And honestly? That was only the beginning.
This is my official Neurospicy Crush Timeline™ — a love letter to weird, chaotic, totally valid crushes that shaped me in all the best (and weirdest) ways.
🦊 1. Basil Brush
Vibe: Posh fox. Comedian. Chaos gremlin in a cravat.
Why it made sense: He was funny. He was charismatic. He wore suits and told jokes like he was hosting the BAFTAs. My autistic brain said, “yes. This is my person.”
It wasn’t even a furry thing. It was a vibe thing. He radiated safety and silly and sass — all in one chaotic fox package.
Daisy says:
“You fell in love with a literal puppet fox. And honestly? Iconic. 10/10. I’d have shared snacks with him behind the bike sheds.”
🎤 2. Shayne Ward (X Factor era)
Vibe: Softboi with pipes. Peak 2000s hair. Slow motion stare champion.
Why it made sense: He sang Breathless. He did heartfelt covers. He looked directly into the camera during emotional key changes. Shayne Ward was the human version of a pop ballad, and I was invested.
X Factor nights were events. Watching him win felt like we won. And yes, I had the CD single. Of course I did.
Daisy says:
“You fancied Shayne like your future depended on it. That man could’ve sung the alphabet and you’d have printed out the lyrics.”
🧍♂️ 3. Callum in 10B
Vibe: Slightly mysterious. Sat in the form group next to mine. Probably bathed in Lynx Africa.
Why it made sense: It didn’t. But the neurodivergent brain doesn’t need logic. I saw him once by the lockers and apparently that was enough to launch a four-week romantic spiral with no dialogue.
The crushing moment:
One day, in what I thought was a perfectly harmless conversation, Callum casually said:
“Hannah Montana? My little sister likes her.”
The world crumbled a little. That line hit like a judgment-shaped brick to the face. My crush didn’t just fizzle… it disintegrated under the weight of beige-boy indifference.
Daisy (who’s still fuming):
“He said ‘my little sister likes her’ like that was a burn?? Babe, your sister has taste. You have dry toast energy and a fake Adidas bag.”
🎭 Bonus: Daisy vs. Callum in 10B – The Showdown
(Because we couldn’t just let that Hannah Montana slander slide.)
CALLUM: “Hannah Montana? My little sister likes her.”
DAISY: “Good. Sounds like she’s got better taste than you.”
CALLUM: “Whatever.”
DAISY: “I hope your iPod only shuffles to songs you hate. And that you lose your place in the lunch queue forever.”
Daisy walks away to Best of Both Worlds. Victory: achieved.
💭 Final Thoughts
Do I regret any of these crushes? Not a single one.
They taught me:
- That the heart wants what it wants (even if what it wants is a fox with a catchphrase)
- That taste is subjective but mine has always been ✨correct✨
- And that boys who insult Hannah Montana deserve to be roasted in blog posts over a decade later
My taste may have evolved, but my loyalty to sparkly musical chaos and emotionally intense TV moments? Forever.
Also: I have Myron now.
I win. 💅
Asten Does Nostalgia 
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